Easter Egg #1 Horseisms Page

Favorite Horseisms, Part I: How do you

induce labor in a mare?   -Take a nap.

cure equine constipation?   - Load them in a clean trailer.

cure equine insomnia?   - Show them in a halter class.

get a horse to stay very calm and laid back?   - Show them in a speed class.

get a horse to wash his own feet?   - Clean the water trough and fill it with fresh water.

get a mare to come in heat?   - Take her to a show.

get a mare in foal the first cover?   - Let the wrong stallion get out of his stall.

make sure that a mare has that beautiful, perfectly marked foal you always wanted?   - Sell her before she foals.

get a show horse to set up perfectly and really stretch?   - Get him out late at night or anytime no one is around to see him.

induce a cold snap in the weather?   - Clip a horse.

make it rain?   - Mow a field of hay.

make a small fortune in the horse business?   - START WITH A LARGE ONE! courtesy of Farrier Facts

Husbands v Horses spotted on a coffee mug in a gift magazine

Good things about husbands They're less expensive to shoe. A husband with a bellyache doesn't have to be walked. They apologize when they step on your toes. They seldom refuse to get in the vehicle. They don't panic, yelling and running all through the house when you leave them alone (unless you leave the kids, too). For a nominal fee, you can hire someone else to clip them.

Good things about horses If they don't work out, you can sell them. They don't come with in-laws. You don't have to worry about your children looking like them. They smell good when they sweat. You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape. They don't care what you look like as long as you have a carrot.

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